Let the breath out slowly. The extension is real. It's a genuine opportunity. And I don't know what I want to do. What does your gut say?
She almost laughed. My gut says I want to be on your porch drinking coffee, Clare. Professionally, she said. Professionally, my gut says yes. It says this is the moment everything that comes next gets built from.
And turning it down because I miss Atlanta would be the kind of decision that I would spend the next decade second-guing. He was quiet for a long time. Long enough that she said, "Andre, I'm here. " He said, "I'm thinking, what are you thinking? " I'm thinking, he said slowly that I'm tired of missing you. And I'm thinking that being tired of missing you is not the same thing as wanting you to come home before you're ready. And I'm working very hard to make sure I know the difference between those two things before I say anything else.
She sat on the floor of the empty venue and felt something move through her chest that was too complicated for a single name. That might be the most honest thing anyone's ever said to me. She said, "I told you I'm done calling things something else. " I know. A pause. What if I'm not ready after 12 more months?
What if the next thing comes along and I'm still not? Then we deal with that then, he said. I'm not asking you to map out every exit before you decide to walk in the room. He paused. What I need to know right now is one thing.
What? When you imagine accepting the extension, he said. And you imagine 12 more months, does the picture include me? She answered without hesitation. Yes.
Okay, he said. That's it. Okay, that's it. His voice was steady. If I'm in the picture, then we figure it out.
We've been figuring it out for 4 and 1/2 months. We can figure out 12 more. A pause. You should tell Helen yes. Andre, you should tell Helen yes, he said again.
And then we're going to have a different conversation about what changes because some things need to change. I need to see you actually see you in the same room. I can call you every morning for 12 more months, but I need he stopped. Gathered himself. I need you to come home for a weekend before you decide.