He could hear it. He still is, Marcus said firmly. Yeah, she cleared her throat. How's Amara asleep dreaming about fish? Probably.
She's been very focused on fish lately. A small laugh. Why fish? I genuinely don't know. We went to the aquarium 2 weeks ago and something clicked.
Yesterday, she asked me if we could get a tank. What did you say? I said we'd think about it, which is parent code, for I'm going to look up the cost and the commitment and have a real answer in a week. You're going to get the fish, aren't you? I'm going to get the fish, he confirmed.
I'm powerless against that kid. Emily laughed again. A little longer this time. A little more real. She sounds amazing.
She is. Marcus said, "She keeps me honest." He paused. She said something last week. She said, "I have sad, tired eyes sometimes, like I'm looking at something that isn't there. She's 8 8 and 1/2." She would specify.
Marcus, that child is not 8 and 1/2. She's 45 and she is wise and she is watching you very carefully. I know. He said she gets that from Renee. He stopped then kept going because somehow at 9:52 p.m. in a dark apartment, it was easier than it had ever been in daylight.
Renee was like that. She didn't miss things. She'd look at you and just know before you said a word, like uh she was reading something written on you that you didn't know was there. The line was quiet. She sounds like she was extraordinary.
Emily said she was. He let it sit. I don't talk about her enough. I think I've been protecting her, keeping her private. But I think it's also just if I talk about her, I have to feel it again.
And if I feel it again, I don't know how long it'll last. The grief. The grief. Yeah. It lasts exactly as long as it needs to, Emily said.
And then it changes shape. It doesn't go away. It just becomes something you can carry differently. a pause. At least that's what I'm being told. By people who have been through it.