She reached over without looking at him and took his hand. Ryan saw it. He looked at their joined hands. Then he looked at Marcus with an expression that was complicated and honest and older than anything else about him. In that moment, he nodded once.
Marcus nodded back. Ryan closed the folder. There's nothing else in there that involves you. The rest is business documentation. Client lists, that kind of thing.
I wanted you to know I wasn't lying about that. There really was a client list. David did write a note about wanting me to have it. He paused. But it's your choice.
It's always been your choice. I should have said that the first time. Take it, Clare said. If it was what David wanted. Ryan looked at her.
He was your brother, she said. Whatever was between us toward the end, he loved you. Take the list. Ryan stood up. He picked up the folder.
He stood there for a moment in the middle of the room like a man who has delivered something heavy and doesn't know what to do with his hands now that they're empty. For what it's worth, he said to Marcus, she's she's a lot like David. The way she handles things. Marcus looked at Clare. I know.
Ryan let himself out. The front door closed. The room was silent. Clare sat with her hand in Marcus' and her eyes on the middle distance. And Marcus let the silence be there because he understood that what she needed right now was not words, not comfort, not any of the things people reach for when someone is hurting.
What she needed was exactly what she had someone sitting next to her who was not going to flinch. After a long time, she said, "He gave me a year of not knowing. " Yeah. And I was furious at the universe the whole time it was happening because I didn't understand why he was getting worse and then better and then worse. She closed her eyes briefly. There were days I thought I was losing my mind, reading signs wrong, misunderstanding what the doctors were saying.
I thought it was me. It wasn't you. I know. Now I know. She opened her eyes.
"But I lived that year feeling like I was on the outside of my own life. " Marcus turned toward her. "That's not protecting someone," he said carefully. "I understand why he did it. I think I understand what he was trying to give you. " But he stopped. "Say it," she said.