The house was whole. Maggie should have been happy. It was what she had always wanted, a house that kept the rain out. Instead, she sat in the dark kitchen in the middle of the night and cried by herself without making a sound so she wouldn't wake the boys. By morning, the rain had stopped.
Isaac loaded his toolbox and his duffel bag into the bed of an old pickup truck he'd borrowed from a man in town. He strapped little Rose into her car seat on the bench, snug and secure. Maggie came out on the porch with Jesse on her hip. Sam stood by the gate, kicking at the gravel. The goodbye was short.
"Thank you for everything," Maggie said, doing her best to keep her voice steady. For the roof, the windows, the porch, the door that finally shuts. "Thank you," Isaac said, "for my daughter. You saved her that night. I won't forget that as long as I live."
He held out his hand. Maggie shook it quickly. Isaac climbed into the pickup. Sam, his eyes red, asked, "That's it. That's all."
"Come here, Sam," Maggie said softly. "Let the man go on his way." The truck shifted into gear and started down the gravel drive slow because of the potholes. Maggie stood on the porch, watching. She didn't call out.
The truck was getting closer to the gate. There was still time. She knew there was still time, and still she didn't call out. Then Sam turned to his mother. "If you didn't want him to go, why'd you let him?"
Maggie opened her mouth to answer and realized she didn't have one. She looked at her son and then at the truck pulling away. Years ago, Travis had left. He had decided all by himself, something that changed all of their lives without asking a single one of them. And now here she was doing something just like it, driven by the very same fear, letting someone walk away without telling him what she felt, hoping he'd somehow guess so she'd never have to risk putting her heart out there. She didn't want to be that.
Not after everything. Not in front of her son. Maggie handed Jesse to Sam. Hold your brother a minute. Hold him tight.
And she started walking. And then she was running toward the gate. "Isaac!" She shouted. "Isaac, wait!"
The truck stopped. Isaac got out, not understanding, and walked back toward her. Maggie reached him out of breath. "I don't know if this could ever work," she said, the words tumbling over each other. "I don't even know if you're ready for anything right now.