She looked at it. I want you to make a statement, she said, to the press before tomorrow. Tell them you acted independently, that I didn't solicit your help, that there was no relationship beyond no. Quentyn, your suspension. If I say it, it means the rest of it is also true.
His voice was even. I won't confirm their version of what happened. Not even the parts that feel small. She looked at her hands outside. The radiator clicked.
I'm not afraid that you'll fail, she said finally, quietly. I want you to know that it isn't I've watched you work. I know what you're capable of. She paused. I'm afraid of myself, of what I do with hope when it goes wrong.
I've built my entire life around not needing anything I couldn't replace. She stopped again. If I believe this and it doesn't, Helena, she looked up. The promise I made you that first night, he said, it was never that you'd walk out of here perfect. I can't promise that.
Nobody can. He came and sat in the chair across from her, close enough that she didn't have to raise her voice. What I promised was that I wouldn't let you quit while there was still something to fight for. That's all it ever was. He looked at her steadily.
You still have something to fight for. The door to Nia's room opened. She patted out in socks, holding a smaller notebook, not the one on the table with a rubber band around it. Dad asked me to keep this," Nia said, handing it to Helena. "He said in case something happened. " Helena took it and pulled off the rubber band.
Inside, in Quentyn's careful shortorthhand, were three months of session notes, every reflex response, every contraction measurement, every progression from no sensation to warmth discrimination to sustained loadbearing. On the final page, a signature she recognized, Dr. Carol Meyers, licensed clinical supervisor, Quentyn's University, with a date and a brief attestation confirming she had reviewed and co-signed the documentation as part of an approved independent study. Helena read it twice. Then she looked up at Quentyn. Bridget knew about the supervision.
She said she had access to my university file. Yes, she filed the complaint anyway. She needed the story more than she needed the facts. Helena closed the notebook. Her thumb moved once across the cover.