But what they needed was for him to learn to think like them. To see the world the way they did. And then maybe, just maybe, he could help them survive it. The training changed after that. Ethan still taught marksmanship and tactics, but he also started teaching the things Nashoba had shown him.
He took the young men into the canyons and made them find water, build shelters, move without leaving tracks. He taught them to use the terrain not as a battlefield, but as an ally. Kael took to it immediately, his young eyes sharp and his instincts good. Some of the others struggled, especially the ones who wanted to fight, who wanted revenge for what had been taken from them. Ethan understood that hunger.
He'd felt it himself, still felt it if he was honest. But he also understood that hunger would get them killed. One afternoon, 3 weeks after his walk with Nashoba, Ethan was working with Dakota on tracking when Ayla appeared. Her face was pale, her movements stiff. "What's wrong?"
Ethan asked immediately. "Nothing. I am fine." "You're not fine. What happened?"
She looked at him for a long moment, then said quietly, "I am pregnant." The world seemed to stop. Ethan stared at her, his mind blank, unable to process the words. "What?" "I'm pregnant with your child."
But we never I mean, we didn't We did. Once. 3 weeks ago. Do you not remember? He remembered.
They'd been sitting by the fire late one night, talking, and something had shifted between them. It had been quiet and unexpected and over quickly, neither of them speaking about it afterward. I remember, Ethan said. I just didn't think Neither did I. But here we are.
Ayla wrapped her arms around herself. I'm telling you because you deserve to know, not because I expect anything from you. "What do you want to do?" I want to have this child. I want them to live.
I want them to see a world where we are not always running, always hiding, always one step from dying. Her voice cracked slightly. I do not know if that world exists, but I want to try to find it. Ethan reached out and took her hand. "Then we'll find it, together."
You do not have to I know I don't have to. I want to. He pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her. I want this. I want you.
I want to build something that lasts. Ayla buried her face in his chest, and for a moment she was just a woman, scared and hopeful and human. We will try, she whispered. We'll do more than try. That night, Ethan lay awake long after Ayla fell asleep beside him.
He stared up at the stars visible through the smoke hole in the roof and thought about the future. About the child growing inside Ayla. About the world they would be born into, a world of violence and hunger and constant flight. He thought about Emma, the daughter he'd lost, and wondered if he deserved a second chance at fatherhood. Wondered if he could be the kind of man a child needed, the kind who protected instead of avenged, who built instead of destroyed.