I hadn't thought about that. That these tough men might have been hurt kids once. How did you find the club? I ask. Hawk found me, Patch says.
I was 18, living on the street, stealing to eat. He caught me trying to steal his bike. He laughs at the memory. Dumbest thing I ever did. What happened?
He could have beat me. Called the cops. Instead, he bought me a burger. Gave me a job washing bikes. Patch runs a hand over the motorcycle beside him.
Save my life. Before I can respond, Mama Carter appears at the door. There you are, she says. Your mother's looking for you, Eli. It's almost 8.
I check my watch. Time flew by. Mom will want to leave just as things are getting interesting. Patch walks me back to the main room. Mom stands with Hawk, deep in conversation.
Can't promise that, she's saying. It's not that simple, Sarah. They won't stop. Hawk says, "You know they won't. " Mom sees me approaching. She forces a smile.
Ready to go, Eli? I want to say no. I want to stay in this place where people look me in the eye where I'm not the weird kid, the burden. Can we come back? I ask instead.
Mom and Hawk exchange a glance. Something passes between them that I don't understand. We'll see, Mom says, which usually means no. Hawk walks us to the gate. Patch brings his bike around with the side car.
Thanks for coming. Hawk says to mom. It means a lot. Mom nods. Thank you for dinner.
It was not what I expected. Hawk's mouth quirks in that half smile. We get that a lot. As Patch secures my chair in the side car, Mama Carter rushes out. She hands me a small package wrapped in nap cookies for later, she whispers.
Don't tell your mom I'm spoiling. I tuck the package into my jacket. Thank you. She squeezes my shoulder gently. Come back soon, Eli.
You brighten the place up. The ride home is quiet. The night air cool against my face. I feel different, lighter. At home, mom helps me into the apartment.
She seems preoccupied. They were nice, I venture. Right? She sigh. Yes, Eli.
They were nice. So, we can go back. She sits on the couch, suddenly looking very tired. It's complicated. You're just a kid.
You don't understand. I understand. They're the only ones helping me, I say. The words come out sharper than I intended. Mom flinches.
Eli, that's not fair. I'm trying. I know. I say quickly. I didn't mean it that way.
She stares at her hands. Deputy Hargrove came to see me at work today. My stomach drops. What did he want? To warn me about the club, about Hawk.