The van had four FBI surveillance specialists inside operating in 12-hour rotations. The van had four 4K cameras pointed at my house. The van had directional microphones. The van had a tactical radio loop tied to the Tampa field office. The van had been recording in continuous loop since 7:32 a.
M. On a Wednesday morning in May. The bureau had also delivered a small Pelican case to my front door that night. Inside the case were 12 high-definition wireless cameras and a single black hardware switch about the size of a deck of cards. The switch was wired to a hidden line that ran to the FBI van.
The switch was in the bureau's quiet language the panic button. I mounted the cameras at every angle of my property. I tested every camera. I mounted the switch on my kitchen wall behind the spice rack at exactly May's eye level when she stood on her toes. I sat May down at the kitchen table that night with a glass of milk and a chocolate chip cookie.
I told her everything. I did not soften it. I told her there were people who wore fake police uniforms in our neighborhood who wanted to hurt our family. I told her that I had been working with my old colleagues at the FBI for months. I told her that if the men ever came to our door, she was not to call 911.
I told her she was to walk to the kitchen, flip the small switch behind the spice rack, and then sit in the laundry room with the door locked until I came for her. She listened. She did not cry. She nodded once. "Grandpa, mom would be proud of you.
I did not sleep well that night. The final HOA enforcement notice was hand-delivered to my mailbox on the 3rd Tuesday of May. It was on Bayou Pines Estates letter head. It bore Carlen Vorhees's signature. It informed me in three short paragraphs that I had failed to comply with 17 separate HOA violation notices over the preceding 6 weeks.
That the total amount due was now $63,400 and that under Bayou Pines Estates HOA bylaw 14.3, the association reserves the right to authorize private enforcement personnel to enter the property and effectuate physical compliance with the association standards. That last clause was new. It also did not exist anywhere in Florida law in Florida HOA statute or in the actual recorded Bayou Pines Estates declaration of covenants. I had pulled the declaration that afternoon. I had read it twice.
There was no physical compliance clause. Carlen had invented it. I scanned every page and forwarded the notice to Camille Mortonson and to my own attorney, a former federal prosecutor in Sarasota named Wyn Castellano, who had retired from the U. S. Attorney's Office 2 years before me.
Wyn called me back in 11 minutes. Hayes, three things. One, Carlen Vorhees has just written on her own signature an authorization for armed private personnel to enter your property. That authorization is legally meaningless. It is also a confession of intent to send armed personnel to your private residence.