You've been deciding this whole time, he said. Not. She stopped. Not consciously, but yes. In the background.
Is that why you came to the beach that day? She looked at him. Something in her expression shifted in a way that told him he had found something true. I needed to think," she said quietly. "I've been going to the beach when I need to think, and I hadn't been going enough. " He exhaled slowly through his nose.
He looked at the table. He looked back at her. "What are you going to do? " he said. "I don't know yet. " Her voice was honest and undefended. "I know what the money means.
I know what going back would mean professionally, and I I know," she stopped, started again. "I know what staying here means. I'm not pretending. I don't know. She met his eyes, but I needed to tell you because you've been honest with me about everything and I haven't been honest about this and it was starting to feel like a lie by omission.
He thought about what Deshawn had said. Don't blow it by being scared. He thought about Clare saying the same thing to him in different words. Stand on what you know. Thank you for telling me, he said.
Marcus, I mean it. Thank you. He kept his voice even. And I'm going to say what I think because that's the only way I know how to be with you. He paused.
I think you already know what you're going to do. I think you've known since before you told me and I think you're telling me tonight because you needed to say it out loud to someone who matters enough for the telling to count as a decision. The words landed. Clare's face did something complicated. Something that was not crying, but was adjacent to it in the specific way of someone whose composure is entirely voluntary.
That, she said quietly. Might be the most accurate thing anyone has ever said to me. Am I wrong? She was quiet for a long moment. No, she said.
You're not wrong. He nodded once. He reached across the table and put his hand over hers just briefly, just enough to be real. And then he moved it back. Then you already know, he said.